Marriage????

Perhaps my brain or mode of thinking is off beat because I am thinking it would not be so bad to get married again.  Yeah, it does sound off the wall and bizarre, however, there was something to being married that I can’t quite put my finger on.  What the fuck was it?  I think I should mention that my marriage was shitty to the max, yet I endured it for 2 years and 2 weeks before I kicked his ass out and filed for divorce.  What kept me in the marriage as long as I was in it was that I thought that I had made my bed and thus must lie in it.  Never a harsh word to him did I utter despite the fact that he was a total useless ass.  Getting rid of him was real simple and I did not and have not missed him for one nanosecond from the time I threw him out.  Well then, what was the perk?  It surely was not sex as he was as useless as tits on a bull.  So, what could it have been?  I am sitting here scratching my head and ass wondering what selfish area within myself did it address?  For the life of me, I can’t think of what it was.  Maybe it was just the sharing aspect.  Then again, what the fuck did we share?  There were all those fake “I love you” statements that we both made yet I wonder if that had a part?  Nah.  I can’t say for sure what it was, but lunacy must be setting in as I think I would take a go at it again.  Yup.  I think I lost my marbles.  Someone please shoot me! ~ Maggie ~ March 31, 2010 @ 2:36 p.m. EST

Addendum: It could be that MAX is playing a sick April Fools joke on me.  Meh.

Individuality~

Why do I spout rounds of current events, history, philosophy, evolution, or even stories of sometimes long forgotten circumstances, and then bounce into rounds of tell me this and tell me that?  It is just an effort to create an interaction, a dialogue, or a debate.  There are times when I seek depth and know it lies within, but my axe, pick, and shovel meet bedrock.  Depth is there and at times I reach it, but I am like a blind person whose outstretched arms reach into the dark so as not to bash my face.  To be seen and not heard is more of a role for a mannequin.  A “doll” sort of woman of silent and brainless nature never to speak or question.  Oh, but speak only when spoken to in simple form do answer.  This is not my character for sure nor will this ever be my character.  Perhaps what I speak of is of oil and water nature.  Coexistence is fine as there are no combustible substances within the tube.  The grandness of the separateness leaves the two substances to be themselves never to merge into one.  When merged into one, one could lose themselves in the process.  There are two sayings that have me baffled: “Birds of a feather flock together” and “opposites attract.”  Which is correct? ~ Maggie ~ March 30, 2010 @ 8:01 p.m. EST

A Friendly Argument~

Looking at the networked society as a whole and the evolutionary scale in regard to information, how would one find a greater fitness for survival in an urban jungle?  Using key words  “choosing what information is valuable to them,” hypothetically speaking, what if the majority of those that are networked derive their information from getting into others’ lives such as celebrities or politicians instead of living their own life?  What if the computer were used strictly to see what is the latest fad/fashion or the best electric toy gizmo?  What can be derived from that information?  Would, or could, this equate to a mental devolution?  Could idiocracy occur?  Has it occurred to a degree?

I agree with your stance on trust, but I must note that two people can see the same thing objectively, yet differ subjectively.  That is where a truth can change.  Also, when conducting research, is it not possible to find conflicting data?  When the sources have two sides, who is to say who is right?  Does this again revert back to intuition and one’s subjectivity?

A hypothetical scenario again: I am a selfish person who has a child/children and a parent/parents.  A circumstance arises which brings a catastrophe to me, my child/children, and parent/parents.  We are all trapped under debris from an earthquake and not a soul is around for miles.  My oldest child gets free and tries to rescue me, but I say “help your siblings.”  Upon my own freedom, do I seek to rescue my parent/parents or my child/children first?  I would rescue my child/children first.  Is there anything spiritual about that or is it a logical choice?

Now I notice you mention good and evil and I must question those words.  IF abortion is viewed as EVIL by some, does that make it so?  Winning a war by killing civilians seems rather evil to me, but governments do that on a constant basis.  Also, war does not necessarily equate to a military invasion.  War could mean trade competition.  This seems peaceful enough, but look at how it affects the lives of those who suffer slave wages and who cannot afford to eat or seek medical treatment.  This type of war is not limited to the north American continent.     

Winning and success: Simply put, I rather be a goose.

Spirituality: What type of spirituality defines winning and success in terms of “rewards for compassion in the afterlife?”  Why does anyone or anything have to “suffer to prove [their] devotion to God?”  Personally, I get my reward to a good deed done immediately as I feel good about doing it.  I don’t have to wait, but I guess that is because I am my own god.  I can’t speak for others, but I can speak for self.  Therefore, I must say that to suffer to prove anything to anyone is jackass retarded MOREOVER, when the thing that one is trying to prove it to has NO VALID PROOF of existence.

The organisms that choose to sacrifice themselves do so for the betterment of their group.  As chances are, the group is part of their family/community.  Just think, if you were in a fire, wouldn’t you bang on the doors that you see closed so that those inside would not die of smoke inhalation or would you run and leave everyone to die?  If you didn’t bang on the doors and, it were known (these are key words), should you be in a fire again and YOU are behind the closed door, you may not get your door banged on.  There is logic running here.  Do you not find this argument valid?  If not, please argue it.  I see selfish working where perhaps you do not.

Whoops...back to the organism who is willing to sacrifice self. In yelling out an alarm for the group to run, the organism becomes a target. This does not mean that the target will die, but it can. However, what if the alarm were not put out and the whole group were to be killed? How would that play on the lone survivor? Has it in fact survived in the gene pool? Might I add, this scenario of hypothetical content is located in the land of Nod. The organism is now extinct for saving its own ass. ~ March 25, 2010 @ 9:29 p.m.

Dynamistic

At a loss for words.  Knocked off my spunk in a moment or moments of "I don't give a fuck."  Everything and nothing matter.  Nothing and everything gnaw away at my gray to spin yarns or tales in an explosive fashion, yet such cannot escape me.  Perhaps the visions are too dynamic for mere words.  Possibilities!

The concoctions that I arrive at are not here and thus lay elsewhere for now.  However, part of me sees the dominoes and their form respectively.  Repeatedly forming functions at junctions that I see in abstract design.  Linear is simplex of complex spins.  It is like playing cards in the dark while knowing what my hand is and what will be picked up after discarding despite the fact I cannot see it anatomically.  A chain interlocked seemingly straight until huddled to the ground and viewed through a smudge lens so as not to note precisely where each link essentially ties in.  Might it be projection of forthcoming supposed reality?  Perhaps.  Thus far I find it grand even if I cannot verbalize or form to writ said issues.  They still exist.  That is my truth if truths are told.  In effect, I am bringing about the cause.  Yes "I do give a fuck" or I would not be.  For all things a purpose and a purpose for all things.  Yes.  Do I touch you?   My "sentence structure" is incomplete.  ~ Maggie ~ March 23, 2010 @ 6:23 p.m. EST

Criminals :-)

This went out to my daughter...

Okay, so I thought I was beat in the charge department, however, upon closer inspection, I too pled down from a D felony to a misdemeanor.  Why do I say it was a felony?  Well if one is pleading DOWN to a misdemeanor, then the assault was NOT a misdemeanor to begin with.  It was a felony.  This left me with two misdemeanor counts. To this I had to pay almost $1,000 to Victim Services.  You are lucky to have gotten off with $120 fine and a mere misdemeanor instead of a felony charge and grande bucks to pay.  Therefore, I am one up on you.  However, the bravado that I heard in regard to the charge reduction, makes my event seem blah.  Also too, I never was arrested and for that I am thankful.  I can’t say that I would want to spend any time in jail although your time sounds rather thrilling.  Be glad they did not take your butt to Rikers.  Then again, would you like to have to go to Manhattan Criminal Court over and over and over again just to plea down?  I don't think so.  If memory serves me right, this endeavor took a few months to knock out.  You got yours knocked out overnight.

The only thing I can think of in regard to your knowledge of “cool” is when I wanted to pop you and told you how it would go down if you called the police on me.  If you remembered from there, you are going good.  That is the only place in my mind that brings remembrance about playing it out.

You are catching up with me kiddo in all departments like clockwork. Now stay out of trouble.  ~ Maggie ~ March 11, 2010 @ 7:35 p.m. EST

God, reality, belief, objective, subjective, and truth~

God, reality, belief, objective, subjective, truth...I can only speak of self in regard to being my own god and creator of my own world/universe.  With all the abstracts the mind holds, where could reality be held save for what we perceive within our mind?  Would that not be our belief?  Our own senses create our reality and are both objective and subjective.  You and I can see a white door or smell something burning, however, I may see hues of blue or pink within the white door or perhaps I will see images of people or objects that you do not.  Is it true what I see?  Hell yes. Can I show you?  Maybe.  The burning of something can be agreed on as well, however, I may smell just wood and you may smell meat.  You may even be able to hone the meat down to beef, but will I have the same message?  Maybe.  Maybe not.  Would we both hold truths?  Yes.  All is a matter of perception open to the individual to make of it what he/she will.  Even if looking at our own selves within the realms of the micro, we are full of holes.  Where lies solidity?  Here, there, and everywhere...are we not?  Reality: The one true thing that I can believe in and is my reality is me.  To borrow from Descartes: Cogito ergo sum.  No certainty lies on anything else or anyone else as this may all be a dream that we have created.  We, the gods, have created ourselves and from ourselves have created bogus gods in our own image.  If one were to set out to prove that I do not exist, they would only satisfy their own mind as one will never be able to convince me otherwise.  I will always believe in myself.  That is my truth, my god, my objectivity, and my subjectivity.  According to the constructs of this world, we are energy.  IF this is true, then by the first law of thermodynamics, we were neither created nor can we be destroyed. ~ Maggie ~ March 11, 2010 @ some point in the p.m.

This was a response to “The Enigma of the Absolute” as posted elsewhere by a friend.

Hubris In A Bottle

I come across many an interesting individuals in due course, but this bugger gave me an idea. The idea sprang from a question I posed of him in regard to Al Pacino's face. We ended up talking about the "red paperclip" and "dehydrated H2O" and its sale. Not for anything, Barnum said that there was a sucker born every minute. With that in mind, yet giving power to mind, what if one were to bottle hubris to give those without gonads the ability to have gonads. The method is simple: provide a bottle, filled or not, with the supposed hubris, however, the individual who makes the purchase must believe the product WILL work in order for it TO work. It is rather like believing in god, only you believe in yourself instead. As mentioned in the video, the placebo can come in various forms. Let me know your thoughts. Maybe I will give you a penny. Then again, maybe I won't. YES THIS HAPPENED IN REAL LIFE. ~ Maggie ~ March 8, 2010 @ a time unknown. Meh.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-h6Y64YPOFA

An Inspired Dialogue

I CAN'T SAY TO WHOM I WRITE NOR CAN I SHOW MY NOR HIS COMPLETE WORDS, YET I THOUGHT THIS WOULD BE FAIR TO SHARE. IF MY INSPIRATION SHOULD READ THIS, NOTE THAT YOU HAVE CREATED THOUGHT WORTH SHARING. I THANK YOU YET AGAIN FOR ALL THAT YOU ARE.

I hope you find love and are loved in return. Isn't that one of the most wonderful things in life? Maybe some don't find value of the right kind in such. Too honed to ownership it seems.

In being our own gods, do we require others to worship us? That is like putting the cart before the horse. We need only worship ourselves and perhaps worship another. To say for sure what is in another's heart or mind would not do us justice as we are not there. We are here. We are in our own world and they are in theirs. Do I make sense? All have the capacity to worship someone or many, but who will they worship first? I can't answer that with certainty as I know not another's priority. Perhaps it depends on the value and the time the value is called. Again, do I make sense? Wouldn't we just be assuming how others feel about us no matter who the other is? Can we ever be totally certain about THEM? We CAN be certain how we feel about self and others and there is stops. It stops back at self. Tis pied again. With another/others, we are left with assumption(s). If this causes ill ease, then it is suggested that value revert back to self. What world do we know better than our own? Yes. That is what I mean to say.

You say: "within us is the connection to all the celestial power that plays with the universe, the divine and majestic manifestations that drove the storytellers and the wise to put hands on spheres of influence and eyes of the eternal on humanity. yet, not all inspire awe and wonder, not everyone can relate to what is not manufactured and placed in front of them. if we are our own gods who will worship us and place faith ahead of disaster and ruin or even beauty or life? what will drive us to perfection beyond a calculated measure of deification?"

SELF. WE are left to that task. I am open to debate.

Schoppenhauer had me look at will and representation: truth! Truth to any man, in higher regards, is a matter of what he perceives. Can perception be changed? Aye. Yet it is for the viewer to modify. Again, do I make sense? I can't let go of self.

Once again I shall borrow from *Shakespeare and **Thales: "To thine own self be true" and **"Know thyself." Are we not within the sphere to be true and to know? When standing in your shoes or in your skin, who is with you?

With this I leave you to ponder my friend. Luck in love!

~ Maggie ~ March 8, 2010 before 3:00 a.m., but after 2:30 a.m. EST

Obstacles and a Cartoon

At times I wish to be cradled like a child, however, these times are rare. More often than not, I cradle myself. Tis best. I personally find it difficult to ask for assistance unless I can pay for it or it comes from a source that I can willingly accept. Yes. It is my independent nature. Too strong at times can cause its own stressors. Abilities that I know I have and yet I am unable to perform them, for now at least, disturb me. To the Max. Ah yes. This one thing that can also cause my downfall. The push too hard can cause breakage. Despite this fact, I can figure out a way around it at best or die trying. Obstacles are meant for jumping are they not?

Speaking of dying...just the other day I imagined myself in a cartoon scenario where I fall dead to the floor. It is a rather graceful fall and I look nothing like the toon at all. She has the whitest of skin, almost sickly in color and she has no face. Her arm is the last thing I see to fall, yet there is an artistic gesture to it. There is softness. Her hand is open, palm up, and her index digit points to an unknown region. Wooden are the floorboards characterized by grain and knots yet they too are soft. Actually, the whole scene is pastel. The chair from which she fell is obscure from vision and yet it lies somewhere in the background. As her naked spirit exits her body, she looks down at it in dismay. Markedly so, her fists beat at the body while her silent scream speaks: LET ME IN. Hum. It is rather humorous when seen within the mind as the spirit wonders HOW DO I GET BACK INTO THE MATRIX. It was pondered that I would take over another body. One of my choosing and thus use it as a weapon. A weapon you say? Certainly! A weapon is not merely an object used for “inflicting bodily harm or physical damage.” It is also a “means of gaining an advantage or defending oneself.” ~ Maggie ~ March 2, 2010 @ 11:19 p.m. EST