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Thursday, February 26, 2009

Pandora’s Box

What is in a name? Ah, Pandora! Peter Peaches had so kindly given me this name sometime back, and perhaps he was onto something he saw in the future. There is something about Greeks and me. Hum. He once asked me if I would teach someone something that we were discussing. The question was geared at getting what I wanted by creating it myself to my own liking. At the time the thought had not entered my mind and upon contemplation the idea seemed ludicrous. Today I do not believe it to be so.

Perhaps I have not taught per se, but it might be perchance that a slight molding might have been done or some cat was loosened slightly out of its bag. In hindsight, his craft of word may have planted a seed indeed as the conversation is readily memorable. When next he and I speak, I shall state that the name was finally accepted by me on February 21st in the wee hours of the morning. I called it upon myself aloud and thus it became me in the becoming. Thank you Peaches!

I do remember a discussion with Deej in regard to restraints that I had placed on myself and why they were placed. Actually, I still have my words of the conversation with her that note my frustration. Thank you Deej for allowing me to vent my feelings.

Hail! The box has been opened just a wee crack, but me thinks it is enough to fling it wide open and throw it to the floor. Circumstances can align like perfectly placed dominos. In the precision of placement it would only take one strike to make them all fall down.

Will Sunday afternoon find me with lobster tails or filet mignon sporting some Kolinsky sable brushes from British Blueprint? I have yet to decide what is on the menu and where I shall spend my time. Alas, decisions.

In the wheel of life the possibilities and probabilities are endless if you deem them so. One just needs to deem them so. ~ Maggie ~ February 26, 2009 @ 2:00 a.m. EST

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Where lies the idiom?

Oh what tangled webs we weave when first we practice to deceive. ~ Sir Walter Scott

Where lies the ayes that see
In state of grace's writing
But for worth of dual?
Truth be told,
Glance me once I feel...
Naught, but aye!
When expressions go unsupported
Words resorted and distorted lie low
Lo!  Recognition my cognition!
I glance per chance to see
Patterns!
When a set does not quite match
Of the mouth or hand dost hatch
What lies a trap might snatch
When all is watched as a batch
Perhaps it thought I should not catch
On the surface without a scratch!
Ten point demerit for the lash
Do I think there was a clash?
Perhaps I did jump up to bash
Balderdash!
When once swinging from a sash
The hangman’s noose is but a dash
From things I hold within my cache
The spider’s meal of meat is hash
Of a potato I did smash/mash ~  Maggie ~ February 25, 2009 @ 6:44 p.m. EST

Sometimes there is an art to it.  Sometimes there is not. The dark side will always be within me as it is within YOU. YOU being whomever reads this. To deny a dark half is to deny truth. Light and dark co-exist. To know one is to know the other.  To deny is to lie.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Reflection...A dialogue in fiction~

I did love you, but alas I am now but a reflection of you.  The image (behavior) you have shown me is now MINE.  I claim it in words and deeds.  What matter would it be if the mirror reflected back to you what you portray?  Should the image looking back at you be more than what you yourself contain?  Me thinks not.  Granted, there are mirrors that reflect back greater than what is and that is rewarding and inflating to you is it not?  However, how pretentious is it?  In the end, what is gained in the reality of it all?  Might I say that fools CHOOSE not to see reality and I am no fool.

Is there anything lost?  Am I losing anything?  NO.  What was given was given freely of my free will.  I only rescind what is in my power and right to rescind.  Adjustments have been made along the way in this learning experience, but in truth I saw the light from the start in the form of “warning” signs.  My journal verifies all as does the analysis.  In my free will, the blind eye (which is not really blind, but was more at feeling things out) is open and has spoken.  In my focus, I stated TRUTH and only truth.  When a behavior is detrimental, change the behavior pattern.  When a behavior goes unrewarded, cease the behavior.  Why be self defeating?  It is dumb to be so.  Adaption and/or self-modification are handy tools in this lovely game of life.

Over all, at least I can say “I care” for you just as much as you care for me.  As only you know how much you care for me, you now have a gage in which to assume my care.  Rest assured that I will equal you.  That being said, have you lost anything? 

In the end, all things being equal, you will have to live with the reflection in the mirror and the true reflection is that of SELF when looking past the image.  Images are illusions and that is my firm belief as what lies without is not necessarily what lies within.  ~ Maggie ~ February 16. 2009 @ 8:07 p.m. EST.

Thursday, February 12, 2009

To Someone I Love~

At times I can be difficult and almost come off as some cold hearted bitch. Okay. It is not almost come off as, but do come off as a cold hearted bitch. For that I apologize. However, you know me and you know that I love you no matter how I “behave.” Not ALL my behavior is indicative of my feelings.

I have not been a good mother, but I hope you will be. I know you will be. Silly me with my thought was thinking...I hope she drags the kid up rather than raises it. You may say WTF to that too or ask what is the difference. The difference is in that the child who is dragged up will learn to fend for itself and will not depend on you. That does not mean that you will not love it and it will not love you. Again, behavior is not always reflective of feeling. I can’t tell you what is involved in raising a kid as I don’t know. Then again, I think about those that were supposedly raised and those that were dragged and if you ask me, they are all mental. Perhaps the difference that I see is the crippling or inability. The “I can’t do it myself.” No. I don’t speak of that which cannot be done due to the illness or weakness of your body. Then again, even in the weakness of body, one who is crippled, will push themselves to the limits. At this point, I do not suggest that you do that. On the contrary. Chill.

Today you said to me, that one day I will need you to help me. I will not let that day come as it is not for you to help me. It is for me to help myself and let you live your life without such an obligation. Perhaps you can understand why I do not want you to have the burden of my remains upon my death. I am not your responsibility. Let the ghouls do without the $$$ and donate me to medical science where I may do some good.

Perhaps you will question your own feelings and wonder when the time comes. Perhaps upon presentation to you, you will be like WTF? Oh, but it is mine! All mine! Yeah it will be. However, the bond will take time. You won’t know how you will feel until it happens. Perhaps you won’t feel as I did.

Consider this: What happens when you hold the strings too tight? What happens if you hold the strings too loose? What happens if you don’t hold the strings at all, but another does?

Often I wonder who you would have been had I had you to myself without interference. Often I wonder who I would have been had there been no interference. It is hard to say.

The one thing I can say, that I may not always show, is the fact that I love you.

I never made it easy for you nor did I ever behave in a loving and kind fashion. Perhaps the pictures that you shared of me sporting a Hitler mustache was very appropriate. I can’t say that I look like him, but I sure as hell acted like him when it came to academics. Let’s call Laura and she can tell me about it while you laugh out loud.

You will be fine my love and you will live long and prosper with your son. That is my wish as it is your wish. I shall not allow negative information to bust that which I believe. You too should know in your heart of hearts that you are strong and will not leave without a fight. Fight with all you have as there will be someone new in this world who will want to know you and love you despite your flaws. He will see them, but out of love, he will look past them. You too see my flaws and note them accordingly to which I more or less agree. Despite this fact, you too love me. The same will happen to you when it is your time. To your son, you will be everything. To me, you are everything. We are UNCONDITIONAL come hell or high water we belong to each other.

You, my dear, are the courageous one who risks it all for the sake of your belief. To that, nothing could be more admirable.

You will always be my baby no matter how old you get. Remember that. ~ mom ~ February 12, 2009

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Morph...

What shall I be today?  A bumble bee?  A teacher? A weeping willow tree?  What if I was just a spider?

Sitting in traffic, my little buddy talked about flying out of the traffic like a super hero which is a grand idea as we would travel fast.  However, I had suggested that if we could put our arms out of the window and have the right aerodynamic shape and strength, we could lift off with the car.  This brought us into another discussion.

Ah, the conversation with my young friend was interesting as we discussed molecular transfer from point A to B with a glitch.  We imagined a transfer pod like that on “Star Trek” with a glitch similar to that of “The Fly.”  This is where our imagination differed from those stories.  Much like the transporter in “Star Trek,” a being (one of us) could be molecularly broken down and transferred to another place and, much like “The Fly,” something else would go along in the breakdown.  The question brought forth stories as the to the end product of molecular bonding with that of another specie.  However,  UNLIKE “The Fly,” the molecular bonding result would be an immediate metamorphoses.

He asked me what I would want to transfer with to become a part of and I told him a spider.  Although this was detailed out in discussion, I won’t do that here.  My little buddy is a curious child who reads and asks questions.  He also has a good imagination.  Before dropping him off, I told him that he is special in that he thinks about many things where as many children do not.  He was told that what he possesses is a great quality and that he should always feed that quality with more information to grow on.  In my heart of hearts, I believe that he will feed his mind well. ~ Maggie ~ February 7, 2009 @ 9:40 p.m. EST

It is hoped that I can share my encyclopedias with him as well as many books that he may find interesting.  Where one has interest, one will gather information with ease.  Thanks goes to my friend Angel for letting me borrow her son for a few hours. Also, my thanks goes out to Tyson for providing such great company via his insightful and witty conversation.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

REAL LOVE...

My friend from Germany is someone I love with a full heart because of his being.  He can bring forth tears and pondering with mere words.  The tears are not of hurt: they are tears of joy or acknowledgment from literature or communication.  It is free flowing emotion on both ends.  My friend understands distance and lack of communication YET we communicate.  His letters written by his hand are reviewed now and again, and one must still be answered.  In that respect, I am a bad friend, but he understands me.  In reading a communication that he sent me today in response to one I sent him, I get hit with that REAL feel of LOVE.  What do I love about him?  I love his purity, his rebellion, his words, his mind, his understanding ways, his look on life, and love.  I love everything about him.

He is young, but his philosophic mind is like that of one that has been here long before.  Our ties are in our friendship and our friendship will supercede all else as that is the way of it.  We both know we will love each other forever and we are happy with that knowledge.  To those of you who think of this as a romantic kind of love, do think of romantic in the way it is used by poets, writers, artists, musicians, philosophers, and anyone who sees past what is presently viewed as romantic.  See the idealism instead.  Uwe, you are my comrade always!  I love you now and forever! ~ Maggie ~ February 4, 2009 @ 4:49 p.m.

VD and Suckers...

As you all know Valentine’s Day is about to lurk its ugly head out and make suckers out of most of you.  Why?  It is because you fall into the pattern of capitalistic and unrealistic relationship pressure.

Women, do you feel unloved if forgotten on VD?  Men, do you feel pressured to buy on VD or you will have to listen to the WHINE factor because all her friends got something and she didn’t?

Women, are you so shallow that you NEED bonbons, hearts, and cards on this day from your man to prove his love?  Men, are you so shallow that you NEED to run out and buy shit to prove your love?  That is not love so pay attention.  You are participating in a bogus event.  IF you really love someone, you don’t wait for the holidays to prove your love by buying bogus bullshit for your sweetie nor should your sweetie expect you to buy her bogus bullshit.  If you love someone, you have been proving by giving your love all year.  Right?  Then again, how many of you really love?

Not for anything, if you give your love all year round in the most real sense of the meaning, the bogus bullshit that VD represents will not mean shit to you.  Hey, if you wanted to show your love on VD, then give of yourself.  Oh wait...if you do that and your sweetie is only WANTING something other than love like material objects, then you are fucked.  Get those wallets out boys and be prepared to kiss some ass.  You only have 10 tens days left.

In a way I kind of like this day as it shows who is real and who isn’t.  Ah, most relationships are not real so it will kind of be like “I AM A SUCKER” day.  Could you folks stamp that on your forehead so I can laugh at you?

As I close this, I wish all you suckers a happy VD and hope that one day all y’all get real.  However, I won’t hold my breath as I might turn blue. ~ Maggie ~ February 4, 2009 @ 7:32 a.m. EST  

Monday, February 2, 2009

What we’ve got here...

When looking into a fire many colors are seen.  The colors one may see are red, orange, yellow, blue, and white.  Of course the hottest is the blue or white fire.  Then again, what are the coldest colors?  Light blue represents cool as does white with a hue of blue represent cold.  White is not really a color.


Fire has a symmetry to it.  It has a top, bottom, left, and right.  Imagine if you will taking your arm and placing it where you think it is hot only to really know how cold it is?  Would there be risk of burn?  What if said this way: Lets say you know someone does not really give a damn or two flying fucks, would anything you do make a difference in their demeanor toward you or about themselves?  What is your risk of getting burned by them which is really you burning yourself?  If there is no fire, you can’t get burned.  The fire has to exist in symmetry in order to burn.

One of my best sayings is you have to burn to learn.  Not for anything, getting burned is good for you. However, if you are cold to the matter, all the heat in the world won’t make a damned snowflake melt. ~ Maggie ~ February 2, 2009 @ 9:31 p.m. EST

When you know...

Signs are all around if you pay attention. A sign or symbol only stands for something, but that does not necessarily make it that which it stands for.  Thus the reading of this and that will not be plastered in black and white as it  would be too obvious.  Cloaked is what the sign or symbol believes it is.  Would you go for that?  A sign/symbol covers the core of what it is pasted to,  painted to, or shaped to be by drawing your attention.  What appears is not always what is.  Be thee not fooled.  Something other than the advertisement on the billboard or the word(s)/shape on/of the street sign exist, however, you have to see past what initially draws your attention.  It only takes a second to make the realization, but that second is worth it.

When reading signs, it is also handy to have a thermometer as well so that you may UNDERSTAND the hot or cold aspects of its properties.  A patient individual who knows that the sign is but a cloak and the temperature reading without the proper instrument will be wrong, should take the time to disassemble the parts to find out what are its properties and what holds it together and why.

Behavior dictates that most humans do not like to read lengthy pieces nor do they like to read the fine print.  It is rather like the bible toting.  People rather just be told what it is about than to read and examine the works for themselves.  Ahem–I have my electron microscope out. ~ Arachne ~ February 2, 2009 @ 12:16 a.m.

NOTE: Writers can and do sometimes use words or metaphors to cover or state what they really mean. Do I really mean a sign or symbol or is that too a sign or symbol for something other than what I state? Signs/symbols could also be reflections in pos or neg form. Now play with it.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Pondering the Reality~

Take me for no fool.  I have gauged the reality and it has been greatly pondered.  Only a fool would not see ahead and behind to draw the circle that encompasses all.  If one is not aware to take into consideration reinforcement/extinguishment of self and other(s) behavior(s) that work/do not work, one will err in similar fashion time and time again.  What is the fun of that?  That is like playing Monopoly and being stuck in jail while everyone else is going around the board collecting their $200 upon passing go OR trying to ram your face through a concrete wall only to bloody your face with every attempt.  What is life if not a place to learn and grow?  Try.  Try again works sometimes, but it really depends on the dice and who is playing.  

Reality–it is rather multifaceted and glitters a spectrum of color depending on how you move the crystal.  If you so choose, the colors could be ripe for the picking or they could be mild and easily looked past without amazement.  I would rather be amazed.

Glory to toys!  Playing with life is like playing a game in which you choose the best path to win.  Of course you play selfishly, but not in a fashion that would make your opponent or opponents quit.  However, if they do quit, you could always play with yourself.  

Fashion dons what is expected and sometimes what is not.  Is it fashionable to wear short pants in a naked society?  No.  However, would you be distinguished from the lot?  You bet.  Adapt for reasons of reasonableness, but so long as they are for SELF. ~ Maggie February 1, 2009 @ a time unknown.

Works

Not a great many words are exchanged nor has there ever been.  Three years has past, yet there is something in his style that still holds my eye.  I find him a rather quiet soul, but there is an inner fire and fury that burns and attracts me.  He is the type of guy who I would let clip my wing and then chase him with the very scissors only to have him grab them back.  Hum.

I have seen his works over time and the works seem to grow.  How amazed I was to see his latest endeavor that left me rather breathless.  Ah, the craft.  Aye, he wields words well too, but alas those first words are long gone yet remembered although not verbatim.  The words without a face are what got me.  Eventually, the face was there as was all else for the view.  Previous works such as stone and nature shots and I marked my amazement.  However, I give a grand BRAVO and BELLISIMO to his new achievement done in grand design!  What a welcomed share.

Hands...I noticed a long time back...his hands.  From the perspective of an artist, I would want to draw them.  Their design is though chiseled from stone.

Although I have not in all this time met him, it is my belief based on all known data about self and what I can draw from him that we would be EXPLOSIVE.  Explosive can mean many things.  I don’t think that we would see eye to eye and there would probably be some friction as he has been known to be ornery, but he has not seen my ornery.  I am VERY selective with my ornery characteristic.  Life is not over yet and neither are the possibilities. ~ Maggie ~ February 1, 2009 @ a time unknown.